Question

最近你校就“中學(xué)生課堂注意力”在學(xué)生中進行了調(diào)查，下面的表格為你校的調(diào)查結(jié)果（表中數(shù)據(jù)為學(xué)生人數(shù)百分比）。請你向某英文報紙投稿，根據(jù)所提供的信息介紹調(diào)查結(jié)果并根據(jù)提示給出改善建議。
注意：字數(shù)：150左右；其它建議至少兩點；首句已給，不計入總詞數(shù)。

注意力集中情況	能夠集中注意力:40%
	不能夠集中注意力:60%
注意力不能集中的原因	課堂干擾:30%
	睡眠不足與疲勞:70%
改善注意力的建議	教室：通風(fēng)明亮
	課堂：積極參與課堂活動
	課間：適量活動及適當(dāng)休息
	其它建議？（至少兩點）

Our school has made a survey about how long middle school students can fix their attention in class during each period.__________________________________________________________________________________
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Answer 1

Our school has made a survey about how long middle school students can fix their attention in class during each period. The result shows that only 40% of the students can draw their attention to their class, while the rest of them can not concentrate on the lesson. 30% of the students think the problem is caused by all kinds of noises in the classroom; the other part of students consider lack of sleep and tiredness as the major causes.
Therefore, we advise that the classroom be bright and the air inside stay fresh. As for students, they should try their best to be active in class in order not to be disturbed by others. During the breaks, they can take some exercise or have a little rest in the classroom. Also, it is necessary to balance their diet. Talking to the classmates may also help them relax. Keep in mind that all work and no play make you achieve less in your studies.

試題分析：題目要求就“中學(xué)生課堂注意力”調(diào)查結(jié)果寫一篇作文，介紹調(diào)查的結(jié)果，給出改善的建議。寫作要點以表格的形式呈現(xiàn)，主要從注意力集中情況、不集中的原因和建議三方面著手寫作。使用第一人稱客觀敘述調(diào)查結(jié)果，注意人稱、拼寫和標(biāo)點的準確使用。作文中不能出現(xiàn)語法、時態(tài)錯誤。
【亮點說明】范文用較大的篇幅介紹了調(diào)查結(jié)果，使用了較多的短語和固定搭配：draw their attention to；concentrate on；consider...as；lack of；As for；try their best to；in order not to；take some exercise；Keep in mind等，使作文內(nèi)容變得充實；
范文注意使用Therefore, Also等銜接上下文和前后句，使作文顯得緊湊，邏輯性強；
范文還使用了一些語法知識：虛擬語氣we advise that the classroom be bright；固定句型it is necessary to balance their diet；動名詞作主語Talking to the classmates may also help them relax；賓語從句that all work and no play make you achieve less in your studies等，語法知識掌握得比較牢固。