Many jokes are made up about famous people. Here is one about Bill Clinton, the former(先前的) president of the united States.

Hillary died and went to heaven. When she was met by the Angel Gabriel she noticed behind her a wall of unimaginable proportions(部分) that was completely covered with clocks.

“What are they?” she asked the heavenly angel in complete surprise.

“They are lie clocks. Each time you lie, the hand moves a little bit to the right. See that one?” the angel pointed to one that hadn’t moved at all, “That’s Mother Theresa’s, who has never told a lie. And that one,” he points to another, “That was Abraham Lincoln’s. He only ever told two lies.”

Hillary looked around with some interest, then wandered back over to the angel again.

“Excuse me,” she asked, “but where is Bill Clinton’s clock?”

“The Lord Jesus is using it in his office for a ceiling fan.”

1．The clock of Bill Clinton is used as a ceiling fan because ____.

       A． the lord Jesus likes him

       B． the wall was already covered by other clocks

       C． his clock moves fastest

       D． his clock moves too slowly

2．It was suggested in the joke that ___.

       A．Hillary couldn’t find her own clock        B．Mother Theresa told the fewest lies

       C．Clinton is a big liar                               D．The Lord Jesus likes clocks very much

3．Who is the most honest person mentioned?

       A．Bill Clinton                                 B． Mother Theresa

       C． Abraham Lincoln                         D． Hillary

練習(xí)冊系列答案
相關(guān)習(xí)題

科目：高中英語 來源：測試專家課課練單元練　　高二英語(下) 題型：050

閱讀理解

閱讀下面短文，從每題所給的四個選項中，選出最佳選項。

　　Shopping for clothes is not the same experience for a man as it is for a woman. A man goes shopping because he needs something. His purpose is settled and decided in advance. He knows what he wants, and his objective is to find it and buy it; the price is a secondary consideration. All men simply walk into a shop and ask the assistant for what they want. If the shop has it in stock, the salesman promptly produces it, and the business of trying it on follows at once. All being well, the deal can be and often is completed in less than five minutes, with hardly any chat and to everyone's satisfaction.

　　For a man, slight problems may begin when the shop does not have what he wants, or does not have exactly what he wants. In that case the salesman, as the name implies, tries to sell the customer something else, he offers the nearest he can to the article required. No good salesman brings out such a substitute impolitely; he does so with skill: “I know this jacket is not the style you want, sir, but would you like to try it for size? It happens to be the colour you mentioned.” Few men have patience with this treatment, and the usual response is:“This is the right colour and may be the right size, but I should be wasting my time and yours by trying it on.”

　　Now how does a woman go about buying clothes In almost every respect she does so in the opposite way. Her shopping is not often based on need. She has never fully made up her mind what she wants, and she is only “having a look round”. She is always open to persuasion; indeed she sets great store by what the saleswoman tells her, even by what companions tell her. She will try on any number of things. Uppermost in her mind is the thought of finding something that everyone thinks suits her. Contrary(相反的) to a lot of jokes, most women have an excellent sense of value when they buy clothes. They are always on the lockout for the unexpected bargain. Faced with a roomful of dresses, a woman may easily spend an hour going from one rail to another, to and fro, often retracing her steps, before selecting the dresses she wants to try on. It is a laborious process, but apparently an enjoyable one. Most dress shops provide chairs for the waiting husbands.

1．What does the passage tell us about women shoppers for clothes?

[　　]

A．They welcome suggestions from anyone.

B．Women rarely consider buying cheap clothes.

C．Women often buy things without giving the matter proper thought.

D．They listen to advice but never take it.

2．What does a man do when he can not get exactly what he wants?

[　　]

A．He buys a similar thing of the colour he wants.

B．He usually does not buy anything.

C．At least two of his requirements must be met before he buys.

D．So long as the style is right, he buys the thing.

3．Many jokes make fun of women shoppers by saying that ________.

[　　]

A．they waste money on inferior(劣質(zhì)的) goods

B．they should buy only the best clothes

C．they are much more sensible than men

D．they think of the price of clothes and nothing else

4．What is the most obvious difference between men and women shoppers?

[　　]

A．The fact that men do not try clothes on in a shop.

B．Women bargain for their clothes, but men do not.

C．Women stand up to shop. but men sit down.

D．The time they take over buying clothes

查看答案和解析>>

科目：高中英語 來源：2011年普通高等學(xué)校招生全國統(tǒng)一仿真考試（二）英語試題 題型：050

閱讀下列短文，從每題所給的四個選項(A、B、C和D)中，選出最佳選項。

　　Shopping for clothes is not the same experience for a man as it is for a woman．A man goes shopping because he needs something．His purpose is settled and decided in advance．He knows what he wants, and his objective is to find it and buy it; the price is a secondary consideration．All men simply walk into a shop and ask the assistant for what they want．If the shop has it in stock, the salesman promptly produces it, and the business of trying it on follows at once．All being well, the deal can be and often is completed in less than five minutes, with hardly any chat and to everyone's satisfaction．

　　For a man, slight problems may begin when the shop doesn't have what he wants．In that case the salesman, as the name implies, tries to sell the customer something else．He offers the nearest he can to the article required．No good salesman brings out such a substitute impolitely; he does so with skill：“I know this jacket is not the style you want, sir, but would you like to try it for size? It happens to be the color you mentioned．” Few men have patience with this treatment, and the usual response is． “This is the right color and may be the right size, but I should be wasting my time and yours by trying it on．”

　　Now how does a woman go about buying clothes? In almost every respect she does so in the opposite way．Her shopping is not often based on need．She has never fully made up her mind what she wants, and she is only “having a look round” ．She is always open to persuasion; indeed she sets great store by what the saleswoman tells her, even by what companions tell her．She will try on any number of things．Uppermost in her mind is the thought of finding something that everyone thinks suits her．Contrary to a lot of jokes, most women have an excellent sense of value when they buy clothes．They are always on the look－out for the unexpected bargain．Faced with a roomful of dresses, a woman may easily spend an hour going from one rail to another, to and fro, often retracing her steps, before selecting the dresses she wants to try on．It is a laborious process, but apparently an enjoyable one．Most dress shops provide chairs for the waiting husbands．

(1)

According to the passage, when a man is buying clothes, ________．

[　　]

A．

he buys cheap things, regardless of quality

B．

he chooses things that others introduce

C．

he does not mind how much he has to pay for the right things

D．

he buys good quality things, so long as they are not too dear

(2)

What does the passage tell us about women shoppers for clothes?

[　　]

A．

They welcome suggestions from anyone．

B．

Women rarely consider buying cheap clothes．

C．

Women often buy things without giving the matter proper thought．

D．

They listen to advice but never take it．

(3)

What does a man do when he cannot get exactly what he wants?

[　　]

A．

He buys a similar thing of the color he wants．

B．

He usually does not buy anything．

C．

At least two of his requirements must be met before he buys．

D．

So long as the style is right, he buys the thing．

(4)

Many jokes make fun of women shoppers by saying that ________．

[　　]

A．

they waste money on inferior(劣質(zhì)的)goods

B．

they should buy only the best clothes

C．

they are much more sensible than men

D．

they think of the price of clothes and nothing else

查看答案和解析>>

科目：高中英語 來源：2012-2013學(xué)年湖南省瀏陽一中高一4月段考英語試卷（帶解析） 題型：完型填空

In the first week after arriving in the new city for further study, I fell and broke my leg. I was really ___36___by the kindness of my new roommate. “We are family now,” she said when she __37__me lying in my bed with a swollen leg, unable to move. She took me to ___38__ by taxi to get my leg examined. The driver was so___39__ that we arrived there very quickly. After that, my __40___continued helping me though I told her I could do things on my own.
So many blessing I had never expected came to me when I was alone and helpless. Bus drivers picked me up from anywhere they saw me. Many people __41__ the door for me. Such things were small but __42___ for a person on walking sticks.
___43___for people’s kindness, I did whatever I could to make people laugh. I made many jokes about my two sticks and the bad fall. And I tried not to __44__ a single time about what had happened. I also tried to be kind to other students who were injured. I took time to __45__ with a girl in a wheelchair who always ate lunch alone.
I soon realized that pain can be__46__ by mental strength. I could see that although I was using physical sticks, there were hundreds of mental sticks I could depend on. I also saw that sometimes ____47____ situation can be good. There are choices to discover great kindness in the world.

【小題1】
A．touchedB．savedC．curedD．supported
【小題2】
A．heardB．leftC．foundD．viewed
【小題3】
A．hotelB．hospital C．playgroundD．library
【小題4】
A．patientB．a(chǎn)ngryC．kindD．brave
【小題5】
A．driverB．doctorC．familyD．roommate
【小題6】
A．cleanedB．movedC．openedD．decorated
【小題7】
A．hardB．impossibleC．different D．useless
【小題8】
A．In turnB．In replyC．In return D．In addition
【小題9】
A．complainB．a(chǎn)dviseC．miss D．enjoy
【小題10】
A．studyB．discussC．practise D．chat
【小題11】
A．reduced B．gainedC．causedD．limited
【小題12】
A．busyB．unpleasantC．puzzled D．tiring

查看答案和解析>>

科目：高中英語 來源：2015屆湖南省高一4月段考英語試卷（解析版） 題型：完型填空

In the first week after arriving in the new city for further study, I fell and broke my leg. I was really ___36___by the kindness of my new roommate. “We are family now,” she said when she __37__me lying in my bed with a swollen leg, unable to move. She took me to ___38__ by taxi to get my leg examined. The driver was so___39__ that we arrived there very quickly. After that, my __40___continued helping me though I told her I could do things on my own.

So many blessing I had never expected came to me when I was alone and helpless. Bus drivers picked me up from anywhere they saw me. Many people __41__ the door for me. Such things were small but __42___ for a person on walking sticks.

___43___for people’s kindness, I did whatever I could to make people laugh. I made many jokes about my two sticks and the bad fall. And I tried not to __44__ a single time about what had happened. I also tried to be kind to other students who were injured. I took time to __45__ with a girl in a wheelchair who always ate lunch alone.

I soon realized that pain can be__46__ by mental strength. I could see that although I was using physical sticks, there were hundreds of mental sticks I could depend on. I also saw that sometimes ____47____ situation can be good. There are choices to discover great kindness in the world.

1.                A．touched        B．saved          C．cured    D．supported

 

2.                A．heard          B．left            C．found    D．viewed

 

3.                A．hotel          B．hospital         C．playground    D．library

 

4.                A．patient         B．a(chǎn)ngry          C．kind D．brave

 

5.                A．driver          B．doctor          C．family    D．roommate

 

6.                A．cleaned        B．moved         C．opened   D．decorated

 

7.                A．hard           B．impossible       C．different D．useless

 

8.                A．In turn         B．In reply         C．In return D．In addition

 

9.                A．complain       B．a(chǎn)dvise          C．miss D．enjoy

 

10.               A．study          B．discuss         C．practise   D．chat

 

11.               A．reduced        B．gained         C．caused    D．limited

 

12.               A．busy           B．unpleasant      C．puzzled    D．tiring

 

 

查看答案和解析>>

科目：高中英語 來源：2015屆河南省偃師市高一第三次月考英語試卷（解析版） 題型：完型填空

In the first week after arriving in the new city for further study, I fell and broke my leg. I was really   36  by the kindness of my new roommate. “We are family now,” she said when she   37  me lying in my room with a swollen(浮腫的)  38 , unable to move. She took me to the nearest  39 by taxi to get my leg examined. The driver was so   40  that we arrived there very quickly. After that, my   41  didn’t stop helping me though I told her I could do things on my own.

So many blessings(幸事) I had never   42  came to me when I was alone and helpless. Bus drivers picked me up  43  anywhere they saw me. Many people   44  the door for me. Such things were small but   45  for a person on walking sticks.

  46 people’s kindness, I did whatever I could to make people   47  . I made many jokes about my two   48 and the bad fall. And I tried not to   49  even a single time about what had happened. I also tried to be kind to   50  students who were injured. I took time to   51  with a girl in a wheelchair who always ate lunch alone.

I soon realized that pain can be   52  by mental (精神上的) power. I could see that   53  I was using physical sticks, there were hundreds of mental sticks I could depend on. I also saw that sometimes   54  situations could be good. Einstein once said, “You can live your life seeing nothing as a miracle( 奇跡 )   55  seeing everything as a miracle.”

1.                A．a(chǎn)mazed         B．saved          C．loved D．supported

 

2.                A．heard          B．left            C．found    D．remembered

 

3.                A．head           B．stomach        C．a(chǎn)rm  D．leg

 

4.                A．museum        B．hospital         C．playground    D．library

 

5.                A．patient         B．a(chǎn)ngry          C．nice D．funny

 

6.                A．driver          B．doctor          C．family    D．roommate

 

7.                A．listed          B．expected       C．given D．a(chǎn)ccepted

 

8.                A．before         B．from           C．through  D．with

 

9.                A．cleaned        B．moved         C．opened   D．guarded

 

10.               A．hard           B．rare           C．easy  D．weak

 

11.               A．Instead of       B．In place of      C．Except for D．In return for

 

12.               A．believe         B．laugh          C．talk   D．think

 

13.               A．hands          B．books          C．sticks D．stories

 

14.               A．complain       B．a(chǎn)dvise          C．miss  D．enjoy

 

15.               A．both           B．no            C．other D．few

 

16.               A．study          B．discuss         C．practise   D．eat

 

17.               A．reduced        B．seen           C．caused    D．doubted

 

18.               A．since          B．because        C．whether   D．a(chǎn)lthough

 

19.               A．boring         B．unpleasant      C．dangerous D．tiring

 

20.               A．a(chǎn)nd           B．so             C．but   D．or

 

 

查看答案和解析>>

同步練習(xí)冊答案